“for the grandeur that was Rome”
Posted by: Mataachi on: July 25, 2007
You were the last one standing. You have fallen. What else can I say? You have fallen. Ruined grandeur speaks more eloquently than the completely finished, didn’t you know? Once I had faith, my faith is diminished.
If you see me in the street, vacant-faced, do not ask what ails thee? Faith ails me. I’m a believer in search of a faith. You were my religion, my faith, now you are no more. Why should I have expected more from you? I don’t know. I just did.
I have fears now. I did not know fear when I believed in you. You were my bulwark and I did not know. I will shiver now when a breeze blows through the open window. My fumbling fingers will search across the wall for the switch before I enter a dark room. I will want to see my Coca Cola bottle opened before my eyes. I will be me but I will no longer be who I was.
I should not be doing this to me, to you, but I do. I cannot love without adoring without worshipping. It’s my nature, I cannot change it. You were my god though I never told you. You were on my pedestal though I claimed I had smashed all my temples and idolatrous prayer was not for me. How can I blame you when I never told you? I cannot.
I just know this. I’m less now than I was before. This is growing up? I have lost again.
9 Responses to "“for the grandeur that was Rome”"
July 26, 2007 at 1:23 am
There’s no purer love though, than that you feel for someone that fell off the pedestal.
loving despite it all, isn’t that the point of loving?
Pedestals are high and uncormfy, like 6″ heels on a concrete dancefloor.
Take the dance to a soft carpet,and try it barefoot and slow. and watch while your faith again starts to grow. 
July 26, 2007 at 4:29 am
Seems this is a contagious mood/feeling/state. Who started, that evil fungus we must uproot?
July 31, 2007 at 7:33 am
You were my god though I never told you………………………
is that how far it went?
August 1, 2007 at 7:59 am
You were the last one standing. You have fallen. What else can I say?……sorry i remembered that a lot later…that reminds of some movie i remember liking so much but foegot because i watched a lot of the genre that day…
But its an old fashioned movie involving horses…and the …..
August 3, 2007 at 9:24 am
less than you are before, for loving that perosn? of love; wish i could understand it.
August 7, 2007 at 8:31 am
thats what happens when u put someone on a pedestal. I once had a guys i adored from afar. then one day we got introduced. i never looked at him the same again.
July 25, 2007 at 7:42 pm
Faith lost is hard to regain…growing up is full of pain…as my sister’s profile picture reads…”I wish i was still a kid, coz scraped knees are harder to heal than a broken heart” or something like that…